Observations on Cultural Differences

Advice for Latinas from “The Latina Bible,” Three Rivers Press, 2002.

On crossing cultural and generational gaps:

“When you find yourself making decisions that run counter to cultural expectations, my advice is to approach the situation as the Dalai Lama would--with gentle compassion. Gentle compassion, chicas, means to recognize and honor the path your parents have walked, the struggles they have survived, and the era they grew up in. Never forget where they came from. Try on their shoes and empathize with the shock, the fear, and the emptiness they experience as they see their grown daughter live with strange and ‘foreign’ values. Wanting your own space does not mean you do not respect your culture.”

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On Latina beauty:

“I got to college and discovered that Mami’s skinny hija [daughter] was really a chunky boricua [Puerto Rican] in a gringo world! That strange world outside of my barrio and family suddenly stripped my chunkiness and rotund derriere of their attractiveness. Unfortunately, it was my first time away from home, and my desire to fit in was so intense that instead of questioning these new cultural standards, I adopted them as my own--I started a war against my ‘big’ butt and thighs. And it made me feel schizophrenic; too flaca [thin] in the barrio and too gorda [fat] downtown. Where were Selena and J. Lo back then, when I needed them?”