Even on Home Turf, the Lions Get Ripped

Mitch Albom in the Detroit Free Press: “At one point in Sunday’s Lion-Titan game, play was stopped because of a rip in the artificial turf. Eventually--and we’ve had commando raids completed in less time--someone from the Silverdome grounds crew showed up. Here is what he did: He took duct tape, double-sided the problem, and stomped on it until it stayed put.

“Oh, if we could only do that to the Lions!

“Tennessee 27, Detroit 24.”

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More Albom: “The Lions once again drew eight penalties, including roughing the passer, pass interference, taunting and leverage.

“I’m not making this up. They got penalized for ‘leverage.’ What are they, junk-bond traders?”

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Trivia time: Who holds the NCAA Division I-A record for career rushing yards a game?

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Mediocrity the norm: Michael Holley in the Chicago Tribune: “If the NFL is as average a league as we keep hearing then the Bears should have no worries. Each of their five opponents could teach mediocrity seminars (14-15 combined record). They have won four of five against the most average teams the league has to offer. When I hear people say, ‘Well, they haven’t played anybody,’ I always wonder who exactly is a fearsome somebody?

“Other than the Rams?”

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Different directions: Bob Glauber of Newsday, commenting on the Rams’ 34-14 rout of the New York Jets: “One team is on a fast track to the Super Bowl, with an offense that operates with video-game speed and a defense that bends but does not break. The other is on a fast track to 8-8, with an offense that beats up on inferior competition and a defense that acts as if tackling draws a 15-yard penalty.”

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TV excess: Tim Tucker in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution: “Memo to the Fox network: I don’t go to a penny arcade to watch postseason baseball. Just like I don’t sit down to watch a league championship series to be drowned in electronic bells and whistles.

“And how about panning back just a little on those tight facial shots of our favorite players? One doesn’t need to get closer to Derek Jeter than his dermatologist. I am not now, nor have I ever been, a pore man.”

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Going to extremes: Tom FitzGerald in the San Francisco Chronicle: “Denver Bronco receiver Kevin Kasper doesn’t eat pizza, beef, pork, chips, fried foods, cookies or candy. And Baltimore Raven nose tackle Tony Siragusa doesn’t eat anything but.”

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Looking back: On this day in 1992, Dave Winfield hit a two-run double in the 11th inning to give the Toronto Blue Jays a 4-3, World Series-clinching victory against the Atlanta Braves.

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Trivia answer: Ed Marinaro of Cornell, an average of 174.6 yards from 1969 to 1971.

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And finally: A dachshund named Dale Earnhardt was runner-up in the Little Smokies division--dogs under a year old--at the Running of the Wieners in Grand Island, Neb.

More than 70 dogs raced down the 90-foot dirt track during the city’s German Heritage Days. The dogs were split into three divisions--Little Smokies, Frankfurters and Senior Sausages. Winners in each division received trophies; each participant got a bag of dog food.