KIDS THESE DAYS:

Of the events and actions that can adversely affect family life, first or second is credit card debt.

When not properly used, credit cards can sap thousands of dollars from family funds over just a few years; money that could be used for college savings, family vacations or the purchase of a better home. That wasted money comes not from the use of the card, but the failure to pay off the balance each month.

The subject of credit cards hit home recently as three events came together in one week. These events caused my wife and I to have an important discussion with our daughter, now 18 and living away from home.

Last Saturday, Kaitlyn got her first credit card. She applied for it on her own and qualified to receive it because it is secured by the money she has in a savings account. The card has a limit of $500.

When Kaitlyn got the card, I took a few moments to explain to her the responsibility that accompanies it. Far from rolling her eyes at another lecture from Dad, she listened and asked a couple of questions when I was done. Her receptivity was made easier because my wife and I practice what we preach: We have shared a credit card for nearly as long as our 22-year marriage and we have never carried a balance.

Kaitlyn was told that even though her limit is $500, her bill could go well over that if she is not careful. She has been very responsible in other areas of her life, and we have no reason to believe she will abuse the credit card privilege.

Days before Kaitlyn got her card, our son Roy, 16, got a credit card solicitation in the mail. It promised — in large letters — no application fee, no annual fee and no interest on purchases up to $250.

Reading the fine print, however, I understood how the company could give so much away.

If Roy transfers a balance to the card or takes a cash advance, the interest rate on that money is 22.99%. If he fails to make a minimum monthly payment, his interest rate climbs, starting at 25.99%. But it could easily approach the 30% range.

That sounds horrible, but it gets worse. Included in the envelope was a page of 34 stickers, each one representing the image that Roy could have on his new credit card. The images included a pile of cute puppies, the Statue of Liberty and a bird sitting on a cat’s head.

Oh, and there was a sticker with a happy face, too.

Also included was a “Message to Parents,” a third of which preyed on every parent’s fear — that their son or daughter would have an emergency but no money: “…in time of emergency, students can simply reach for their [credit card].”

There is nothing simple about it.

Let me be the next in a long line of people who fully understand that no one puts a gun to the head of a credit card user to get him to buy on credit. Their ongoing balances and their subsequent financial binds are almost always due to poor choices they have made.

But my son is a minor child and is still under the guidance and responsibility of his parents.

There is a movement in Washington to curb the outrageous and seemingly arbitrary fees charged by credit card companies. Frankly, I have no sympathy for people who run up their credit card tabs and fail to pay the balance in full. But I’d rather just see hard limits on these cards; limits that would keep a user able to use the card and still live within his means. For many Americans, that’s probably just a few hundred dollars.

What I’d like to see eliminated is the practice of soliciting minors. This is nothing less than disgusting.

Roy has rejected the credit card offer and will be paying cash for his purchases for the time being. As parents, we can only hope that our example will be followed and that our children understand that credit comes to us these days at a price that is much higher than the interest rate.

STEVE SMITH is a Costa Mesa resident and a freelance writer. Send story ideas to [email protected].