COSTA MESA UNPLUGGED:

A specter has emerged on Costa Mesa’s horizon that may have parts of this place looking like Toontown.

It seems the folks who keep tabs on the water situation around these parts want the Costa Mesa City Council to noodle on the idea of tweaking the city law that pooh-poohs artificial plants in public places like street medians and parkways.

And why? To give fake grass a fighting chance to take root in Costa Mesa’s public domain.

Now it already occurs that water-minded Costa Mesans who don’t much relish lawn-mowing cardio can collect a rebate from the Mesa Consolidated Water District when they purchase and install plastic grass in their yards.

I know. We purists lay sod or seed a lawn. Plastic grass? You gotta install the stuff.

But it seems there are some people in the Costa Mesa Planning Department who sort of fancy the idea of installing “synthetic turf” in public areas around town.

The petro-grass “is attractive and durable and, of course, can save water,” argues a city staff report to the City Council.

Hmmm. My thinking is that petro-grass works fine in Palm Springs trailer parks.

It’s not bad stuff for practicing high-wedge shots, too. And the new synthetic turf field at “Jim Scott Sr.” stadium is a good look at an appropriate use of faux fauna.

How about this brain nugget, though: Does it makes sense to save water by “installing” a petroleum-based product?

I mean, I’m not wild about petro-grass staring me in the face as I drive the streets of Costa Mesa burning $4 gas.

The city could probably do better by investing in other newfangled technologies.

Newport Beach is all over the implementation of Weather Based Irrigation Controllers, which meter out water based on weather conditions, sunlight, soil type and other parameters.

Let’s not have The Truman Show in Costa Mesa, OK?

I’m thinking it’s time, too, for a lot of folks in this city and at the helm of the Daily Pilot to put away their Martin Millard fixation.

Millard is the iconoclastic chap whose numerous essays on genes and race, and the order of nature are used by his detractors to paint the man as the combined reincarnation of Daddy Jim Crow and Hitler.

But that’s too easy and a bit intellectually lazy.

From where I sit, Millard’s essays are overly simplistic and easy to disagree with.

They ignore the unique human qualities that elevate us above the vermin and the insects; things like compassion, love and humanity.

These are the governors who — on most days — bridle us from destroying one another and which temper nature’s otherwise violent and compassionless machinery.

Millard is the most persistent and vocal mouthpiece of Costa Mesa’s Improvement movement.

But he is not the Improvement movement itself. Fixating on what Millard may or may not be doesn’t help the city improve. Or its people get along any better.

Let Marty go.

BYRON DE ARAKAL is a former Costa Mesa parks and recreation commissioner. Readers can reach him at [email protected].