A surefire cure for a negative attitude

“Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you, but as the attitude you bring to life.”

? John Homer Miller

A friend asked me, “Do you remember when people used to say, ‘It’s snowing down south’ as a hint to women that their slips were showing?

“Well,” she continued, “I’m trying to think of a clever comment to say to people to call their attention to the fact that their bad attitude is showing, and I don’t like it. I’m thinking of saying, ‘The Grinch is back’ or ‘Someone let out the hyenas, and they aren’t very funny.’ What do you think of those, Cindy?”

I told her that saying either of those would certainly get someone’s attention, and make them stop and ask what she meant, but I didn’t know how the conversation would go from there. I told her I supposed it would depend on whether the person had a good sense of humor or what kind of mood he or she was in. “I would only say it to someone who was probably in a lousy mood to begin with, but I’d hope it would snap them out of it somehow,” she said. “Well, I’ll keep thinking about it.”

I told my friend that I gave her my permission to try either of her new sayings on me anytime she thought I was stuck in a bad attitude. She smiled, thanked me and then we talked a bit more about how powerful attitudes are.

“That’s the thing about bad attitudes, they’re contagious,” she said. “It’s like being around someone with a lousy cold who is just sneezing and hacking away. They’re no fun to be with, and it’s pretty likely that I’ll catch it too. And I think I must be extra susceptible to catching people’s bad attitudes, so I’m trying to bolster my own, and then think of what to say if I’m with someone whose pessimism is out in full force. I don’t want to be infected.”

I thought about that conversation later when I attended a meeting with several people who had bad colds. I did my best to avoid being in the path of their sneezes and washed my hands afterward, and I also took some extra vitamin C.

Fortunately I didn’t catch a cold that day, but I realized that I had taken some specific steps to try to ensure that I wouldn’t.

Later I talked with the friend who had told me about her desire to avoid catching other people’s bad attitudes and mentioned how I’d tried to avoid catching people’s colds. She thought for a minute and said, “That analogy totally works. If I have to be around people who are negative, I know just the ‘vitamin’ that I need to take, and that is to list things that I am thankful for. The more things I list, the more I’ll build up my immune system to withstand pessimism.”

I asked her if she were still planning on using her catch phrases to try to stem the tide of someone’s negativity, and she shook her head. She said, “Maybe instead I’ll just ask the simple question: ‘What are you thankful for today?’ and see if that helps.”

I think we could all benefit from increased doses of thankfulness. And you can quote me on that.