Awaiting big wave of future

If I’m going to ever become a professional surfer, I need some waves

... Bro.

I concluded my last lesson in the Saturday Surf Class with Scott

Morlan a week ago just north of Newport Beach Pier, and I realized

that one thing has been constant during all four weeks of my

instructions:

Old Mr. Pacific is afraid to challenge me.

Well, I say, bring it. Of course, it’s too late now.

Saturday’s lesson concluded with the smallest waves the class has

seen during the entire course, ranging from ankle-high to knee-high.

The water, described numerous times in the past as frigid, was

surprisingly warm, while the jellyfish count was to a minimum and the

rust-bucket color water was a little clearer.

But there were no waves. Nada. Zilch.

And for that reason alone, Morlan has proposed a science

experiment. Sometime in the next few weeks before all the surf

classes close up shop for the summer, he wants me to come down when

the waves are bigger and give it a whirl.

I’m game.

If I’m ever going to follow in the footsteps of Keanu Reeves or

David Hasselhoff, I need to be challenged. And I have just about a

year until the U.S. Open of Surfing takes place once again alongside

Huntington Beach Pier.

Look out Andy Irons.

Despite the lack of waves, however, I officially graduated from

the Saturday Surf Class with Morlan without drowning once. So I guess

it could have been worse.

The final session involved a series of contests in the water, none

of which I won. Now if there was a best fall-on-your-face

competition, I would have had a chance.

There were several eight-minute competitions, ranging from the

number of waves you can catch to the longest wave ride. But my

favorite, and likely some of my classmates least favorite after a

certain incident, was the headstand.

Probably, in theory, not the safest maneuver, especially with

myself (6-foot, 180 pounds) in a pack with numerous little kids, the

headstand involves exactly what it sounds like -- catching a wave and

then performing the move while riding blindly.

Little Ryan Look, 11, of Newport Beach, along with Preston

MacLaren, 16, of Newport Beach, caught the bitter ugly of my

headstand attempt.

As I finally got my feet straight up in the air, my body flipped

over and I plowed right into the both of them, sending Look to shore

for a few minutes. He turned out to be all right, though.

Of course, I blame the whole incident on Morlan, because, after

all, the competition was his idea.

And on a high note, I concluded my last lesson in the Saturday

Surf Class with Morlan. But my surfing journeys are far from over, as

I will be out in the next few weeks when Old Mr. Pacific decides to

stop being lazy and actually pump out a few waves.

Morlan has offered to provide me a board for the next time I come

out, so hopefully the surf picks up.

As far as mastering the lingo, I think I’ve learned quite a few

things, so, I leave you with this: Hang loose Bro.