Never surrender to stereotyping

FLO MARTIN

I give up.

I surrender -- words that can be heavy with pain. According to my

1971 unabridged edition of the Random House Dictionary of the English

Language, “surrender” includes “ ... yielding something to the

possession or power of another; delivering up possession under

duress; to abandon (hope); to submit or yield.”

My frayed brown-paper-covered 1958 edition of Roget’s Thesaurus

(saved and cherished for sentimental reasons) says that I “cede,

capitulate, come to terms, lay down [my] arms, give way, resign

[myself]; back down, obey ... “

This edition’s introduction includes this wonderful note: “Words

are astonishingly like people. They have characters; they almost have

personalities -- are honest, useful, obliging ... or treacherous,

vain, stubborn ... They shift, as people do, their conduct with their

company. They are an endless study in nature and ourselves, at that

meeting point where our minds are trying to give form or take it from

the world.”

Peter Mark Roget, a British physician, wrote this wonderful word

collection over a period of almost 50 years. The first edition came

out in 1952, and his Thesaurus has been in print ever since. Dr.

Roget was very British -- not only a man of science, but also

secretary of the Royal Society until his retirement. (He not only

took nearly a half-century to write his Thesaurus but also invented

the slide rule, an item anyone over the age of 55 might remember. I

discovered the slide rule at age 15 in my high school chemistry class

in 1958, and Roget’s book in my senior year, a gift from my first

love.)

OK, so why the name “Roget” (which is pronounced” Rohjay”) for a

British gentleman? French heritage, perhaps? French is also the

heritage of the word “surrender,” which my dictionary says originates

from the old French word, “surrendre,” (pronounced “syrrahndruh”)

meaning, “to give over.”

The word “surrender” caused some pain in the heart of my French

friend, Pierre-Antoine, this past Sunday as he and my family were

listening to a pastor talk about the Garden of Gethsemane, the place

where Jesus went to pray and found his moment of surrender. The

warm-up to the pastor’s sermon included a personal vignette and then

-- wham -- he followed with a laugh and a wisecrack about the French.

How come the French always surrender? And, adding insult to

injury, some folks in the congregation actually applauded. Wow! Can

you imagine? My Francophile heart said, “Ouch!”

Cultural generalizations are becoming politically correct. Dissing

the French is now acceptable, even in church.

Some of us shrugged our shoulders when people started calling

French fries “freedom fries,” after the French backed out of

supporting us in a possible war in Iraq, and despaired at Fox News’

report that presidential candidate John Kerry “looks French” and was

acting “more and more like the French” during his campaign.

But, my heart pained for my 34-year-old friend. My thoughts

flashed to a Sunday not too long ago when Pierre-Antoine and his

entire family, visiting from France, were sitting in the same place,

a few rows back from where we were sitting Sunday.

What if the pastor had blurted out this insult while they were

there? That would have been more than just a simple faux pas.

After the service, Pierre-Antoine, my husband and I left the

building via the doors to the left of the stage area and spotted the

pastor, who had ducked out for a breath of fresh air and a quick

carrot-stick snack.

Pierre-Antoine, in his heavy French accent, talked with the pastor

in his typical playful way, but expressed some dismay about the

unfortunate comment. The pastor excused himself and justified the

comment by stating that his origins were French too. Not good enough

in my book. He should have apologized, and in front of all his

parishioners, at that.

On the phone a few hours later, Pierre-Antoine admitted to me that

he felt uncomfortable at first and then shocked when the applause

hit.

“I say ‘stop’ to that stuff. Let’s not pay for the past mistakes

of our countrymen. My German roommate’s last name was “Heil” and she

actually changed it when she became a citizen, because of all the

mess. As senior pastor, [he] should be above stereotyping. I’m

ashamed for him. Making fun of another country is not Christian.”

Amen! Let’s surrender or give up picking on the French with our

jokes and jibes. Let’s go back to ordering French toast, French bread

and French fries. Vive l’amour!

Flo Martin is a Costa Mesa resident and an instructor in the

Department of Modern Languages and Literature at California State

University, Fullerton.