Politics, baseball in high season

JOSEPH N. BELL

First off, if you’re wondering what I was doing at a $1,000-a-plate

function on my income, it was mysterious but legal. According to my

hosts, their Lido Isle neighbor -- allegedly a Republican -- came

over with a check for a thousand bucks and said he couldn’t get to

Teresa Heinz Kerry’s speech at the Hyatt Regency in Irvine last

Tuesday, but would they use the check for some deserving soul who

wouldn’t be able to go otherwise? So my hosts generously chose me.

The shoe fit. Since this affair was closed to the press, and I was

reasonably sure the Pilot wouldn’t pick up a $1,000 expense tab, this

was the only way I could get in.

So there I was at Table One, with a clear view of the podium,

poking at a cold beef-and-chicken salad plate, waiting for the

incipient first lady and wondering if this would play out like a

similar affair for John Edwards some weeks ago when he showed up

about two hours late, hit the stage on a dead run, exhorted us for 13

minutes and then cut out to catch a plane to Florida.

Well, it didn’t. Heinz Kerry was late, but not much, and while we

waited, we swapped election stories around the table. The winner, by

far, was another Lido Isle couple who had a series of Kerry-Edwards

posters stolen from their front yard and their morning paper thrown

up on the roof every day for a week that was climaxed by someone

breaking into their garage and stealing a pile of Kerry-Edwards

posters, presumably to burn them in the dark of the moon with a small

cross. When I heard this story, I was even more grateful to my

benefactor for providing some balance to the Lido Isle crime wave.

Heinz Kerry moved into the spotlight quietly, a slight woman in

red, very much in charge of herself, who was clearly not going to

blow us off with a 13-minute rouser. She spoke three times that long

and never came close to descending into a political pep talk. She was

frequently hard for my hearing aids to pick up, but she was always in

command, speaking without notes.

I have no idea why this was closed to the press since Heinz Kerry

said nothing inflammatory, a welcome contrast to the campaign bile

being offered up elsewhere. She told us that taking part in this

campaign has taught her to “see and hear and watch and learn that the

people in this country are asking for an opportunity to hope and to

do what is right for themselves, their children and their country.”

She devoted a lengthy segment to women’s issues in which she has been

involved, then ended with an eloquent assessment of her husband as

“an optimist who doesn’t get confused or shaken by complexities and

believes this country is rich in ideas and resources.”

She didn’t take off for her next gig after her talk but hung out

to press flesh with an enthusiastic swarm of listeners who surrounded

her. I left remembering her admonition that “instead of telling

people how to think, it’s so much better to think with them -- and I

try to do that.” Indeed she does.

*

No matter how dramatically the polls may disagree on some issues,

there is one statistic on which there has been consistent agreement:

the overwhelming support for President Bush among white male voters.

White men make up about 40% of the electorate, and the Republicans

have been carrying this group by well more than 30% ever since

Richard Nixon. Only Clinton cut into this figure -- apparently with

the proper macho image -- but Dubya restored the gap in 2000 and,

according to current polls, is increasing it in 2004.

Since my credentials as a white American male are lengthy and

impeccable -- I even belonged to a fraternity -- I find such numbers

hard to comprehend. The pollsters tell us that this is because Bush’s

“bring ‘em on,” tough-guy style and folksy, good-ole-boy talk appeals

to white men -- especially the young ones. But there surely can’t be

that many frat boys voting. Or white males susceptible to John Wayne

bravado from a candidate who never got near a battlefield. Especially

when he’s running against one who did.

*

The first presidential debate is tonight, and it conflicts with

the Angel game in Texas, which is bad scheduling on someone’s part.

But that’s only one of the reasons the debate will be a stressful

hour in many millions of American homes where hopes and fears are on

the line. Here, then, are a few suggestions to help you through this

evening:

* If the household -- heaven forbid -- is split, watch on separate

TV sets so reactions to what is going on doesn’t start acrimonious

debates while the candidates are still at it.

* Take bathroom or kitchen breaks only when the candidate you

loath is being questioned.

* Do not click to another station periodically for the Angel score

if your spouse is not as passionate about this critical game as you

are.

* Don’t clutter your head with either the pre-debate or

post-debate punditry. The former is irrelevant, and the latter will

only give you a headache. You don’t need someone to tell you what you

just saw, especially if the Angel game is still on.

* Discuss the debate only with people who believe the same way you

do. You have two choices. You can buck each other up until the

results become apparent, or you can share each other’s disappointment

as a protection if the results are bad.

* Don’t forget that there are two more debates coming up in which

to fix a bad performance or solidify a good one.

* JOSEPH N. BELL is a resident of Santa Ana Heights. His column

appears Thursdays.