‘50 First Dates’ is 50 too long

Evan Marmol

“50 First Dates” should have been named the movie that could not

decide. Was it a puerile comedy, or a lackluster love story? Whatever

it was, it will be profitable once the pharmaceutical companies

purchase the rights to the film and synthesize it into a cure for

insomnia. We are talking about a film that felt like a chore to

watch; painfully burdensome and totally lacking in substance.

The gist is that this Hawaiian, water creature loving, lothario

has been conquering adventurous vacationers. Despite his clever

scheme, he becomes infatuated with a blond-buxom, exquisite native

played by Drew Barrymore. When he initiates a conversation she

reciprocates interest, and he assumes that he is in the clear.

Unfortunately, she suffers from a condition that erases her memories

overnight. With the help of his stereotypical Hawaiian native

accomplice (Rob Schneider), he attempts to win her over -- and over

again -- and force himself into her memories.

As a comedy, it was flat, tepid and nearly absent of humor. It did

have moments that might make you titter, or chuckle, but nothing

substantial. It appears that someone put sugar in Adam Sandler’s gas

tank -- his timing is off -- and he is in serious need for a tune up.

He is a mere suggestion, an innuendo, of the comic genius that he

once was. The only reprieves were the short scenes with Schneider;

who could have carried the film with his outrageous antics if he was

not nearly cut out of the movie entirely.

As a love story if flunked again. While Barrymore was beguiling,

Sandler must have been thinking about tax season, and it takes two

people for a love story to have chemistry. Moreover, the plot is so

ludicrous that you would doubt that these two could even be friends,

not to mention lovers.

This film is a monumental waste of time. Not even die hard Adam

Sandler fans could truly sit through this movie and rate it as

competent. Avoid it like the plague.

* EVAN MARMOL is Laguna Beach resident. He graduated from UC

Irvine with a degree in psychology and social behavior. He can be

reached at [email protected].