Parenting expert inspires Corona del Mar crowd

Marisa O’Neil

William Sears, author of more than 20 parenting books touting

“attachment parenting” and a regular on television talk shows,

brought his message of sensitive child rearing to Harbor Day School

on Thursday.

The lecture on raising a “successful child” and improving

children’s IQ through proper nutrition was part of a parent education

series at Harbor Day and other area private schools. Hundreds of

parents crowded the auditorium, listening to Sears and plying him

with questions for hours.

“I was glad he came [to Harbor Day School],” parent Lucy Rawlins

said. “I think his message is awesome -- to provide your child with

love and attention and what that does for their self-esteem.”

Sears, an associate clinical professor of pediatrics at UC Irvine,

has been a pediatrician for 32 years. He recently moved his practice

from San Clemente to Dana Point with two of his sons. He and his

wife, Martha, a registered nurse, have eight children and drew on

their own experiences to write “The Baby Book: Everything You Need to

Know About Your Baby from Birth to Age Two.”

His philosophy is grounded in the belief that children whose needs

are met early in life and who receive proper direction will blossom

into independent, responsible adults. Early bonding through breast

feeding, responding to a baby’s cries and letting the child sleep in

the parents’ bed provide the foundation, he says, to shape children

into successful adults.

“Parents are like gardeners of the flower garden of their

children,” Sears said. “They can’t control the color or the time of

the blooms. But they can water and prune and fertilize to make the

blooms beautiful.”

Success, he said, should be measured by the positive effects

someone has on the world, not by a person’s earnings or career.

Giving children the proper tools can help them make the world a

better place, he said.

Fostering empathy and compassion should be a priority for parents,

he said. Finding “teachable moments” during the day and encouraging

children to “get behind the eyes” of another person start getting

them in that mind set.

“I wish I’d had his books when my kids were younger,” said Sue

Ellen O’Connor, a mother of four. “I agree that raising children with

empathy and compassion should be the No. 1 [priority]. That’s what’s

going to carry them through life.”

Harbor Day School parent Viviane Ogelvie, who has known Sears for

eight years, managed to book him for the engagement at a substantial

discount from the sum he usually collects for speaking engagements.

Rawlins started reading his articles in parenting magazines 18 years

ago, but was happy to hear him speak in person.

“His love for children is so strong,” she said. “How do you not

walk away glad to be a parent?”

The next speaker in the series will be Michael Thompson, a

children and families psychologist, who co-wrote “Raising Cain:

Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys.” The lecture will take place

9:30 a.m. Feb. 24 at Harbor Day School.