Prices got you down? It could be worse

“Fill it up?”

“No thanks, just two gallons. I only have a twenty on me.”

How ‘bout those gas prices?

In case you missed it, Friday was a big day in the Land of Orange.

Just 48 hours ago, Orange County set an all-time record for the

average price for a gallon of gasoline -- $2.05.

This is so exciting.

The previous record, set on May 25, 2001, was $2.04.

These days, when you slide open the little plastic door on the

pump and reach for the receipt, it’s like getting a letter from the

IRS. You’re afraid to throw it away, and you’re afraid to look at it.

And that’s for my wimpy little car.

My wife has one of those SUV’s that kill everything in sight and

support Al Qaeda, and those receipts I do throw away. My doctor says

I can’t look at them.

The average cost per gallon of gas in California is, of course,

the highest in the country right now. You know why of course.

Everybody does. It’s the threat of war in Iraq. Oh, and the lagging

oil output in Venezuela. Oh, and the changeover from winter to spring

gas mix. Oh, and the high cost of refining gas for California. Yeah,

that’s it. Everybody knows that. That’s why the cost of gas in Orange

County has shot up over 25% since January 1.

Have you ever wondered how they come up with the price of a gallon

of gas? Don’t. It’s bad for you.

But if you enjoy migraines, here’s how they do it. It’s based on

the monthly average of the composite refiner acquisition cost of

crude oil; the difference between the monthly average of the spot

price of gasoline and the price of crude oil purchased by refiners,

which is called the crude oil component; a percentage of that month’s

distribution and marketing costs, and finally, state and federal

taxes.

In other words, nobody knows how they do it.

There is an old saying: “Everything old is new again.” Old sayings

become old because they’re true.

Travel back in time with me to the year 1973 and something called

the Arab oil embargo. In 1973, the Arab countries were really mad at

us. I know that sounds silly today, but they were. They were so mad

that they cut off our oil.

And if you’ve ever had your oil cut off, it really, really hurts.

Gas stations would open at 6 a.m. and run out of their meager supply

of gas within a few hours.

Long, long lines of cars would form before dawn and snake back out

onto the street and around the block. My petroleum purveyor of choice

was a Union 76 station at Adams and Mesa Verde East.

By 6, the line ran the length of Mesa Verde East and almost to

Harbor Boulevard on some mornings. It was like commuting by train.

You got to know everybody around you because you’d end up in roughly

the same spot every morning. We all looked like bored cab drivers in

the hack line at the airport.

Some people would bring cookies or doughnuts and pass them out

from car to car. When the attendant appeared and unlocked the pumps,

chat time was over.

Everyone hurried back to their cars and the line crept forward,

ever so slowly, a few feet every five minutes or so.

Everyone sat in their car and prayed to the deity of their choice

that the attendant wouldn’t give the “all gone” sign before they got

there. And so it went, for more than a year. Before the embargo, gas

was about 30 cents a gallon.

By the time it was over, gas was about $1.20 per gallon. And keep

in mind that in 1974, $1.20 a gallon was even more staggering than

$2.00 a gallon today.

On March 18, 1974, the embargo was called off. But then, an

interesting thing happened. The lines went down within days, but the

prices didn’t. One month, two months, three months, four, but gas was

still a dollar or more.

Hmm. How odd.

Pretty soon, people were in a highly agitated state, with much

huffing and a goodly amount of puffing. Politicians across the land

were waving their arms and jumping up and down really high and

calling for inquiries, examinations and investigations.

Oil company executives spent hours in front of one committee or

another, reading long, mind-numbing statements about “composite

refiner acquisition cost of crude oil” and the “crude oil component.”

Before long, everyone was exhausted. They all went back to whatever

it was they were doing before the embargo. What they didn’t know was

that the days of less-than-a-buck for gas were gone. Gone forever,

and ever, amen.

Last week, a number of state and federal politicians started

waving their arms and jumping up and down really high and calling for

inquiries, examinations and investigations about this ridiculous

notion of two dollars and more for a gallon of gas.

No one knows how high it will go in the next few months, but I

have a bad feeling about this.

Long after the war on Iraq and the troubles in Venezuela are done,

I think that we shall never see gas at $1.50 a gallon again. But

don’t let it get you down.

Remember, the darkest hour is just before things go totally black.

* PETER BUFFA is a former Costa Mesa mayor. His column runs

Sundays. He may be reached via e-mail at [email protected].