From the theater to the grave

In movies like “The One” and “Kiss of the Dragon,” Jet Li has

delivered rock-solid performances. More specifically, he has

demonstrated the acting skills of a hunk of limestone. “Cradle 2 the

Grave” fully exploits Li’s ability as an actor. There is no plot,

there is no story; and there’s no need for him to try to act. This is

a fast-paced collaboration of chases, martial arts fights and other

convoluted nonsense. It is everything that makes a great B movie.

Rapper DMX stars as the leader of a band of highly sophisticated

jewel thieves. After he leads a successful heist of a commercial

jewel vault, he finds himself caught in a web of intrigue surrounding

a bag of rare black diamonds. When his daughter is kidnapped, DMX is

forced to team up with a Taiwanese Intelligence officer played by Li.

For some reason, the black diamonds must be returned to Taiwan to

ensure the safety of the planet. How many movies do you get to see

where Taiwan is responsible for protecting the earth? It gets better.

The third person in the equation is Tom Arnold. This leaves the

burning question; can Rosanne’s ex, a one dimensional martial arts

expert and a brooding rapper save the world? Where’s Rutger Hauer

when we need him?

In some ways, action movies are like porn. No one really cares

about the story. People just want to watch the smackdowns, gunfights

and explosions. “Cradle 2 the Grave” shamelessly embraces this

concept. During the first 45 minutes there’s no attempt to identify

the characters or explain their actions. The lack of information will

leave you wondering who these people are and why they are hitting

each other, but it won’t put you to sleep. Overall, just forgetting

about the plot is a brilliant strategy. Why bother having talentless

actors recite drivel to forward an adolescent, illogical, formula

driven story? It’s more fun just to watch them beat on each other

with the music cranked to full volume.

Overall, “Cradle 2 the Grave” offers no surprises, but that

doesn’t mean you can’t have fun with it. Tom Arnold is funny, DMX is

engaging, and Li is ... well he’s Li. This will be a fun rental on a

night when you don’t want to think too hard. The best part of this

movie is the credits -- and I’m not being sarcastic. Make sure you

stick around for the credits.

* JIM ERWIN, 40, is a technical writer and computer trainer.

‘Spider’ spins an enticing web

“Spider” is adapted from the novel by Patrick McGrath, who also

wrote the screenplay. Canadian thriller director, David Cronenberg,

directs the film.

In the story, the title character, Spider (Ralph Fiennes), is in a

constant struggle to overcome a traumatic event that occurred early

in his life, that now forever shapes the real world he is forced to

reside in. He is given a second chance at life after a long stay in a

mental institution and returns to the streets of London’s East End,

where he is sent to a halfway house under the stern watch of Mrs.

Wilkenson (Lynn Redgrave).

The sights, sounds and smells of being reacquainted with his old

neighborhood, send Spider further down a shadowy path that reawakens

memories of his mother (Miranda Richardson) and his father (Gabriel

Byrne) while a mystery unfolds involving Spider’s days of youth.

The halfway house seems to both confuse and focus Spider’s

perceptions at the same time. Terrance (John Neville), who also lives

in the house, is a kindred spirit and supplies a certain comfort that

was absent from Spider’s life. While Wilkenson starts to embody his

schizophrenic mind’s account of his past, Spider begins to question

his own memories.

Fiennes does a “fine” job never over reaching or imbuing his

character with too many nuances. His best moments are sans dialogue;

the quiet unspoken moments where a twitch, or a movement of the eye,

explains everything. His “Spider” is disturbed, but never disgusting,

only pathetic and in need.

Richardson and Byrne are convincing in their underwritten

portrayals. Bradley Hall, 10, in his film debut, performs remarkably

as the young Spider, and the film is complemented well by seasoned

artists John Neville and Lynn Redgrave.

Cronenberg delivers a powerful, albeit slowly paced story absent

of special effects, but bursting with character and mood. His

minimalist approach to cinematography compounded with the flawless

switch between showing the audience what Spider perceives as reality,

and what actually is reality, serves the film well. It is probably

his finest and most respectable work.

Although it is in limited release, you will be rewarded if you can

find among the web of theaters in your area, one that is showing

“Spider.”

* RAY BUFFER, 33, is a professional singer, actor and voice-over

artist.