In the Spirit

Michele Marr

o7 “That best portion of a good man’s life -- his little, nameless,

unremembered acts of kindness and of love.”f7

-- William Wordsworth

Among my utmost regrets are the opportunities I neglected, or simply

did not recognized in time, to thank someone for an act of generosity or

kindness that made my life richer, brighter, easier -- possible.

Like the refrain in a Joni Mitchell song, “Don’t it always seem to go

that you don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone.” I often seem to

notice and cherish gifts of the heart from the long view of hindsight.

I keep a long list of people -- people whose whereabouts or names I no

longer know and kind strangers whose names I never knew -- to whom I wish

I could send my tardy thankfulness.

I keep the list to thank them in prayer and to ask God to richly bless

them. And I try to pass on to others the gifts they left with me. Often I

think this is how God meant it to be.

What exasperates me is I find it hard to keep my list from growing.

All too often the value of a kind word or a gracious gesture soaks in too

late. All too often I put off saying thank you today for kindness

tendered yesterday, or the day before, or the day before that, or until

my thanks seem far too overdue to say them at all.

And I know very well that is not how God means it to be. Yet, if

Wordsworth’s observation and a week designated “Thanks For All the Gifts

Week” are any indication, I am not alone in this weakness.

“Thanks For All the Gifts Week” is the brainchild -- maybe that should

be heart-child -- of Eva Rosenberg. As far as I can tell, it is mostly a

well-kept secret, but I like the idea very much. I suppose because I need

it badly. And so does Eva, which is why she dreamed it up in the first

place.

Eva placed the week in the third week of August because, she says, “By

the end of August, you’ve lived through Valentine’s Day, Purim, Easter,

Passover, Secretary’s Day, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, graduation, the

Fourth of July, most birthdays, many weddings and showers, lots of new

babies, school hasn’t started yet, the High Holy Days of the Jews aren’t

due for a while [and] it’s still a long way to Thanksgiving, Christmas

and New Year’s.”

When Eva speaks of gifts, she is not primarily talking about the ones

we get in paper and bows or velvet boxes lined with satin. She is not

thinking Hope Diamond or Taj Mahal. Though, certainly those deserve a

“thank you” too.

She is thinking about the day your sister took the kids before you

jumped off a bridge; the neighbor who fixed the toilet when you didn’t

have the money to call a plumber; the retail clerk who called the

manufacturer and traced down the one-of-a-kind button you lost off your

favorite suit after you already lost the replacement button that came

with the suit in that little plastic bag; the auto parts shop guy who let

you in just as he was locking the door when he saw you there with your

lifeless alternator in your hand; the couple who rescued you, a stranger

from the mean streets of the 20th century, from the freeway where your

car broke down and gave you a ride to a phone and your next appointment.

Eva is thinking about gifts that money can’t buy.

“When,” she asks, “was the last time you said ‘thank you’ to all the

people who make your life so good?”

She knows we meant to. She knows that somehow time simply got away

with our intentions. She knows how the days turn to weeks and the weeks

turn to months. She knows we are thinking, “Sheesh. If I send a thank you

now it’s going to be so embarrassing.”

So she came up with this week to give us all a second -- or third or

10th -- chance. This year the third week in August runs from the 12th

through the 18th. So I’m a little late in the game. But there is still

time. Heaven knows I have so many thank you cards I meant to send stuffed

into the drawers of my desks they hardly close. Some cards haven’t even

made it to the desk. They are on the kitchen counter, the dresser, under

the mouse pad or in my purse. I don’t even have to make a trip to the

Hallmark store. All I have to do is buy some stamps and get started.

And what if I don’t finish by the end of the week? Well, I never

remember getting a thank you I didn’t like, however untimely.

How about you?

* MICHELE MARR is a freelance writer and graphic designer from

Huntington Beach. She has been interested in religion and ethics for as

long as she can remember. She can be reached at o7

[email protected]