Retail Roundup

Retail Roundup was shocked -- shocked! -- earlier this week to read a

notice about a product called Preserve, which is apparently a “recyclable

toothbrush” and is sold at Trader Joe’s in Costa Mesa.

You can imagine what we were thinking. A toothbrush that’s already been

in somebody else’s mouth? Ugh!

It turns out, however, that the product is only used by one person as a

toothbrush. After you wear it out scrubbing your molars, you mail it back

to the company. They then turn it into “plastic lumber,” which they say

is a “healthy alternative” to wood.

A healthy alternative? That sort of sounds like something you’re supposed

to eat.

But as long as they don’t make toothpicks out of plastic lumber -- they

don’t, right? -- Retail Roundup supposes the cooties issue is under

control.

Clothing for the countryside?

What would we do without South Coast Plaza? Not only is it home to

McDonald’s, but it will now host a store that promises to sell clothes

that are “sophisticated without being ostentatious; mindful of tradition,

yet modern ... with an easy, relaxed mind-set.”

Just like Retail Roundup! We are in love!

The store in question is Henry Cotton’s, whose duds are supposed to have

a feel inspired by “the Tuscan countryside and English tradition.”

Does that mean they’ll be good clothes for traversing the Orange County,

uh, countryside? Are they good for sitting in rush-hour traffic and

skipping through the shopping malls?

We’ll try to figure out the answer to this question the next time we buy

a McFlurry. Which should be quite soon.

Longing for lavish living

This has very little to do with “retail,” but we wanted to note that the

Costa Mesa location of Glabman’s Furniture & Interior Design will host a

presentation this Saturday and Sunday on “The Grand Lifestyles of

Newport’s High Society.”

That’s Newport, Rhode Island, not the Newport we all love so much.

But Paul Miller, the guy who will be putting on the program, promises

that the event will offer a glimpse into the lifestyles of the “scions”

of the “American aristocracy” whose mode of “lavish living is

unparalleled.”

We at Retail Roundup have always wanted to be somebody’s “scion.” So

we’ll be there, and maybe we can figure out how to be adopted into those

well-cushioned ranks.